Episode 6: The Tinder Games

We open with a belated shout out to marriage equality and lead right in to KRS’s Tinder Drinking Game.  He contrasts his Tinder experience in Philly with his time in Orange County, CA earlier this summer, and we have an unfortunate discussion on D-pics.  We close the first segment with 80/20 rule and some hard truths on attraction in the digital age.

In the news, KRS unpacks some feelings on the Confederate flag controversy this summer.  Our Shower Thoughts segment launches on Donald Trump and lands with a frank discussion on immigration.  We close with our final segment, Meditations and a Chinese proverb: “The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago.  The second best time, is now”

This is the companion audio to Chris’s blog post: Keep on Swiping

Blog: whythehellwouldyoucare.com
Twitter: @WhyTheHellBlog
Email: WhyTheHellWouldYouCare@gmail.com

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This episode sponsored by SmashDiscount.com, use promo code WTH at checkout for Free Shipping and 10% off your order. You can also support the show by clicking through our Amazon.com link when shopping.

Episode 5: From Dusk Till Mexico

In our opening segment, journey with KRS to his decade-ago spring break in Mexico and a strip club with armed gunman.  Tom Foolery of the worst kind ensues  (Producers note – this story grossed me out so bad it took me a while to recover!)

In our second segment we hit Shower Thoughts and news, pondering the fallout of Ashley Madison, thoughts on cheating and how it relates to airport bathrooms always being the-most destroyed.  We close with Meditations, unpacking the incredible story of Sarah Gray and her son Thomas, recently featured on Radiolab.

This is the companion audio to Chris’s blog post: The Saddest Man at Spring Break.

Blog: whythehellwouldyoucare.com
Twitter: @WhyTheHellBlog
Email: WhyTheHellWouldYouCare@gmail.com

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Visit our Shop!  Buy our t-shirts designed and inspired by this podcast at MassRoutine.com

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This episode sponsored by SmashDiscount.com, use promo code WTH at checkout for Free Shipping and 10% off your order. You can also support the show by clicking through our Amazon.com link when shopping.

Sitting In Discomfort

painI’m a junkie.  I’m not saying that to be self loathing, it’s the truth.  I’m not participating in all of my junkie behaviors anymore, but it’s important to remind myself of the fact.  I can’t escape it, I can’t change it, I can’t compose a special cocktail that will allow me to only have a taste.  I’ve proved my thesis that taking opiates and doing cocaine ruins my life many times over.

All that being said, I DO NOT have to live like a junkie.  I don’t have to let my predilections towards certain substance destroy me.  Even when I’m in the most severe mentally or physically pain, there are other options.

Over the last five weeks I have dealt with the most unbearable back and joint pain.  I thought it was from a reoccurring back injury.  I started seeing a chiropractor three times a week as well as doing physical therapy. At first I felt a little relief.  Then the pain start spreading throughout my body, into my joints and I developed flu like symptoms.

I went to my primary doctor, explained my situation and underwent a gamut of blood tests.  It turns out I have an autoimmune disease.  I had JRA (Juvenile rheumatoid arthritis) as a child, but I have not had a severe flare up in 20 years.  I have to see a specialist, but most likely that’s the culprit.

The past five weeks have been hell.  My range of motion is shot.  My joints ache and refer nerve and muscle pain throughout much of my upper body.  I am unable to work out in my normal fashion.  Some nights I don’t sleep.  Yesterday I didn’t get off the couch because my pain my so severe.

Wahhh, boo hoo, lifes hard, I get it.  I’m not writing this to bitch about my pain and have a pity party.  I’ve experienced large amounts of mental and physical pain in my life.  In the past I wanted to get rid of the pain as quickly as possible, by whatever means necessary.  I won’t lie, I still want that. (more…)

What Makes You an Expert?

20130621-expert-monkey

I get tired of being positive.  I don’t want to learn the lessons life is trying to offer me.  All I want is for life to let me live on my terms.  Rarely does it work that way though.

At times I can’t seem to handle whats going on around me.  I’m presented with seemingly large obstacles to see how I will react.  I’m cognizant of what’s happening and even tell myself, “these are tests, handle them in an appropriate manner.”  Yet when I face the challenge, I act the complete opposite of what I’ve prepared myself for and I fail miserably.

I’m angry I have to face the follies of my past.  Others have made similar choices and are able to continue on with what they are doing.  But, for me, it’s never that way.  God always seems to want to take away the things I want to do.  I want to be able to do steroids, take painkillers occasionally and maybe do a line of coke here and there.  I’m bitter I can’t be normal and do things in moderation.

I write a lot about self improvement; dealing with fear and adversity while staying positive.  Hardships have plagued my life for years, so I feel I have a lot of experience overcoming adversity.  Then I have times like this where I can’t follow my own advice and I wonder if I have the right to offer it anyone else.  Am I full of shit?  Where do I get off writing about this stuff?  How can I create a message to help others when I struggle to do it myself?

I read a lot of what so called experts write and I wonder, what makes someone an expert.  How does someone decide they have practiced enough and created a level of success worthy of calling themselves an authority.  Is it the 10,000 hour rule?  Or does it have more to do with what someone can persuade others to believe with their words? (more…)

Who Wants To Follow Their Own Advice?

the_scorpion_and_the_frog

Sometimes I love playing the victim.  I don’t realize it at the time, but that’s exactly what I am doing.  I look at my circumstances or how someone has “wronged me” and I feel sorry for myself.

I vent to my friends in order to validate my own feelings.  I gossip and spin my stories to manipulate the situation.  I want people on my side when things go wrong so they can pick me up, tell me everything will be ok and that I deserve better.  It’s all about ME and MY feelings.

I don’t want to take accountability for my part.  I entered, or re-entered at times, relationships with the understanding of who these people are.  Being naive enough to hope they will change or act the way I see fit.

That’s called being a volunteer victim.  I see countless people playing this role every day.  I despise it, it’s one of my pet peeves.  I call my friends out on it every time I spot the behavior.  Then I turn around and act this way myself.  I’m a hypocrite.

I have lofty expectations others can’t fulfill.  That’s the first problem.  Placing my expectations on anyone else is setting them up for failure.  Any pain and suffering I experience because of the relationship is my fault.

I invest time and emotions into people with poor track records.  Knowing deep down I will ultimately be disappointed and let down.  That was my choice to make.  I knew better and still decided to proceed forward anyway.  I can’t blame others for doing what they always do

It’s the story of The Scorpion and the Frog.  The scorpion asks the frog if he can ride on his back across the river because he cannot swim.  The frog asks, “How do I know that if I try to help you, you won’t try to kill me?”  The scorpion assures the frog he wouldn’t do that because it would leave to his demise as well.  Half way across the river the scorpion stings the frog.  Before the frog dies he says, “You fool, why would you do that now we will both die.”  The scorpions only response was, “I could not help myself. It is my nature.” (more…)

Episode 4: Kayne or Sassafras

Powerful new fans!  Thanks so much to all of you for joining and listening.  You can support this show by telling a friend!

In this episode, travel back with KRS to Memorial Day weekend in Las Vegas.  He may or may not have taken psychedelics, lost money, witnessed the genesis of DJ Chuck Liddell and missed his flight home.  In our second segment: Chris insists on talking about Caitlyn Jenner, learns who Lady Valor is, we wish bad things upon Kayne and discuss the shower thought, “If I ever have my life flash before my eyes, I’ll have to watch myself masturbate thousands of times.”  Our final segment Meditations does a quick but useful outline on the importance of being in the moment.

This is the companion audio to Chris’s blog post: Those Damn Tables

Blog: whythehellwouldyoucare.com
Twitter: @WhyTheHellBlog
Email: WhyTheHellWouldYouCare@gmail.com

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Visit our Shop!  Buy our t-shirts designed and inspired by this podcast at MassRoutine.com

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This episode sponsored by SmashDiscount.com, use promo code WTH at checkout for Free Shipping and 10% off your order. You can also support the show by clicking through our Amazon.com link when shopping.

Pass The Tissues For A Little DVDA

RandyMarshJizz

I hadn’t finished cuming yet, but all I could think about was clicking the X on the browser.  Remorse set in.  The feeling of disgust overwhelmed my body.  I wanted it to stop.  Why did I watch that?  And more importantly how did that turn me on?

I’m not certain what makes me watch the things I do when I masturbate.  Maybe I’m a sick pervert.  That’s entirely possible.  Most women I have dated would probably agree.

Like most of the world I have become desensitized to much of what I see.  Porn is no different.  I’ve watched too much for too long I suppose.  The basic vanilla scene just won’t cut it.  Hell, double-stuffed anal won’t cut it these days.

I’m always pushing the limits of what I consider to be appealing.  I can’t get hard if I’m not looking at something I find completely revolting as soon as I finish.  It’s a strange phenomenon.

Trying to watch the rest of the scene once I’ve finished is torture.  I sit there trying to figure out exactly what turned me on about an 87 year old lady going down on an a midget and a rough-around-the-edges 21 year old girl.  Or why I googled “gross porn” to begin with.

Watching all of these horrible, disturbing scenes has nearly ruined my sex life.  Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to partake in type of stuff I watch, at least not all of it.  But normal sex with an attractive girl isn’t quite as exciting once you have witnessed what my eyes have seen.  I have to close my eyes and picture some deviant sex acts so I can finish.  I don’t want the girl to feel like something is wrong with her because I can’t cum.

I’m not blaming porn for my problems.  It’s absolutely me.  I’ve always been the type that has to push things further and further to see what happens.  Sometimes my inclination to push things to the limit has benefited my life greatly.  Not in this case though.

Occasionally I stop masturbating all together.  Mainly because I’m bored with what I’ve seen and I don’t want to explore new realms of porn.  I can’t handle it.  Finding something new that turns me on is exhausting work.  I can spend 30-45 minutes perusing different categories until I find something that works.  That’s before I even start on myself.  No one wants to put that much effort into masturbation.  I don’t put that much effort into preparing my food for the day and I love eating.

I’m debating starting a support group for this behavior.  There’s probably already something in place, but I want my group to be more fun.  I’ve talked to some friends who seem to share my predilection for masturbating to sex acts that make them question their life.  At least I’m not alone, that’s comforting.  There might be a recovery for us all and we can go back to being excited with basic guy-on-girl action.

 

 

The Thing About Expectations and Assumptions

expectations31

I woke up exhausted, still trying to recover from my Thursday night, which ended at 6:30 Friday morning.  I didn’t want to get out of bed and face everything I had to do today.

My day has been riddled with expectations and assumptions.  I’ve been agitated all day by the littlest things.  My mind is running wild with fear and aggravation.

This morning I went to visit the job site for a rehab I am financing.  The drive took far longer than I had anticipated.  There was traffic, cars moving slowly on single lane road and I seemed to hit every red light.  By the time I got to the site I was annoyed.  I met with my friend who is doing the rehab, only to find the lockbox holding the key to the house was stuck shut.  He tried repeatedly to open it with no avail.  We were locked out.

Since he will be replacing the windows, he broke one and we climbed in like cat burglars.  During our walk through I wasn’t exactly impressed with the progress.  I was having trouble envisioning how the finished product would look.  I had expected to see a greater amount of work done on the property.

This was the first time I saw the house since the rehab began.  I haven’t been asking for updates, nor have I looked at the project schedule.  I had nothing to base progress off of except my own unspoken expectations.  If I had been more involved with the project and the work schedule I might be able to assess if things are on track or not.

Once my expectations came into play my mind immediately became filled with negative thoughts.  I second guessed my investment,  “Why did I get myself involved in this?”  Will I get my investment back?  I pictured the worst case scenario playing out.

I took that same mindset with me to the gym.  My mind kept me from pushing myself and having the workout I wanted.  It wasn’t a bad workout, but it didn’t quite meet the expectation I had in my head.  My arms didn’t get the pump I thought I usually get.  I couldn’t push the weight I normally use.  Whether or not any of this was reality I’m not sure.  But my mind sold the idea to me and made me believe it.

A friend of mine text me to say hello and see how my day was going.   Her replies weren’t fast enough for my liking.   I was annoyed.  Why would she text me in the first place if she didn’t want to have a conversation?  I made assumptions about her reasons that drove me crazy. (more…)

Episode 3: Erik & Rocket Do San Diego

San Diego bar fights, cops and a wildly awkward Craigslist foursome pop off this episode.  In our second segment, Chris’s longtime friend Erik tells his story of flying to Florida to get catfished.  As a bonus, learn how hot water systems work in Iceland.

We close out with our final segment, Meditations – this weeks quote by Rumi: “What you seek is seeking you.”  Erik tells us his journey to becoming a jiu-jitsu competitor and teacher.  You can visit his academy online at bcbjj.org.

This is the companion audio to Chris’s blog post: The Little Asian from Craigslist

Blog: whythehellwouldyoucare.com
Twitter: @WhyTheHellBlog
Email: WhyTheHellWouldYouCare@gmail.com

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Visit our Shop!  Buy our t-shirts designed and inspired by this podcast at MassRoutine.com

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This episode sponsored by SmashDiscount.com, use promo code WTH at checkout for Free Shipping and 10% off your order.  You can also support the show by clicking through our Amazon.com link when shopping.