Be Careful What You Let Into Your Mind

tinfoil-hat-guy

I’m wearing my tinfoil hat as I write this post.  You may want to break out yours too.

Over the last six weeks my mindset has changed greatly.  I believe in the Law of Attraction.  What you think about you bring about.  I’ve focused on fear and negativity, which caused me to make poor decisions repeatedly.  Everything I touched turned to shit.  Even my dog has been keeping her distance from me.

My insecurities are overflowing and spilling out into all areas of my world.  The universe is taking from me.  I want to quit, cash in my chips, get a job with a steady paycheck and give up on my dreams.

I’m afraid.  Afraid I will fail and go broke, never reaching my goals.  Essentially, turning into my father.  That’s the scariest thought of all.

My OCD kicks in like crazy at times like this.  I want to sit around and obsess over everything that has gone wrong.  painstakingly revisit every mistake I made and allow my inner dialogue to tell me what I should have done.  It’s like having a wound I need to keep touching to make sure it still hurts.

I haven’t been taking care of myself and doing the things I love.  When I write I feel like I ‘m complaining about my problems.  Everyone has enough of their own problems, no one needs to read about mine.

I look back at what changed over the last six weeks and one thing stands out screaming right in my face.  My ex girlfriend and I started talking and seeing each other again.  Since we started to speaking the following transpired:

  1. My dog broke her femur and had major reconstructive surgery to repair her leg.  The surgery cost over $6,000.  Thankfully shes healing up great.
  2. My dog had to have a mast cell tumor removed
  3. I’ve let myself go physically.  I haven’t been eating or exercising properly.  Some of this is related to health issues
  4. I’ve lost $25k (on paper) in the stock market.
  5. I have developed some sort of Autoimmune disease.  I find out more this week.
  6. I found out last week I need a rather invasive surgery to remove a tumor from my liver.

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The ‘How-to” Guide For Disrupting Positive Flow

Lately I have completely lost my state of flow.  My schedule is a mess  and my productivity level is at nightmare status.  Not only has this been chaotic for my work life, but it has also taken a toll on my health and my body.  I fully believe that when someone is struggling mentally,  physical issues will manifest shortly there after. I’m having digestive issues, my body fat has increased while muscle mass decreased, I’m physically weak and have almost unbearable back pain.

I’ve seen countless articles on how to enter the flow state.  This post is the complete opposite.  I think it’s a helpful prophylactic to reverse engineer the process in order to see what behaviors caused the problem.  Especially when so many seem rather trivial.  But it’s a snowball effect that escalates quickly.  The list of actions below is  how I created the predicament I find myself in. (more…)

Is Hindsight Really 20/20

“You were too busy sticking steak knives in your pee hole”

I had totally forgotten about some of the odd shit I did in college.   Until an old teammate decided to post that comment for the world to see on Facebook.  Maybe I suppressed those memories or maybe I really had forgotten them.  I used to do a lot of drugs and took several blows to the head, so it’s possible.

It’s amazing to think that I used to stick objects in my pee hole in front of numerous people.  Whats even more mind blowing is that there was always a girl who would witness my ridiculous actions and still say to herself, “Yeah, Im going to fuck that guy tonight.”

Looking back on my bizarre and almost unfathomable behaviors in the past I cringe.  Occasionally I laugh.  Knowing I shoved things in my pee hole is still pretty amusing to me today.  I wouldn’t want to do it again, but I still giggle a bit.

I’ve talked to so many people who say, “If I only could do it over things would be different.”  I’ve said that same statement more times than I can count.  But I’m not sure its necessarily true.  I don’t know that if give then chance I would do anything different.

I made my decisions based on the information and life skills I was equipped with at the time.  Many of my actions didn’t, and still don’t, feel like they were right.  Some have caused me a great deal of pain and suffering.   Other choices felt wrong at the time, but have paid off many times over.

Eight  years ago I left my career in Corporate America to be a full time drug dealer.  I  wonder what my life would look like had I chosen a different route.  Where would I be right now?  What type of career would I have?  Would I be more successful?

Then I realize it doesn’t matter.  The exercise of looking back and wondering is futile.   More than likely, even armed with the information I know now, I still would make the same decisions.

The reason being is I know where my life has gone and I’m happy with the majority of it.  If I made different choices I fear I wouldn’t have had the same life experiences, fallen in love, or lived in the manner I have for so many years.

Who knows were I would be or what my life would look like if I had made different choices.  Maybe my life would be better.  But maybe I wouldn’t have met the people I met or learned the lesson I’ve learned.

Life is about experiences and my life has been rich with them.  I treasure my experiences, even the really shitty ones.  For better or for worse they created the person I am today.

Love and embrace who you are today.  Don’t hate and regret your past.  Instead use it as a road map to build a better future.

 

Coming From a Place of Abundance

For many years my life seemed to work off feast or famine.  I  got nervous and felt the need to hold onto things so tightly because I feared I may never be able to create more in my life.  It was as if I feel that I didn’t deserve money, happiness or women.  I haven’t felt like I was enough in so many ways.  I’m not smart enough, good looking enough, funny enough; so I certainly can’t ever attain what other people have.  That mentality caused me to lose out on many opportunity before I even attempted them.  I forced myself to be a beggar and took what I could get.

This attitude and perspective of not being enough has cost me greatly in life.  I have talked myself out of getting the girl I wanted or the financial success I envisioned without ever making the attempt to go for it.  The fear of failure and self doubt clouded my vision of who I really am.  My jaded view of my abilities and attractiveness have been self sabotaging.

Now there has been times where the opposite is true.   I have been too full of myself and cocky.  I projected arrogance and a false sense of confidence.  My weaknesses were exposed quickly in those cases and I had my ass handed to me.

Coming from a place of abundance isn’t about cockiness or a false sense of self esteem.  It is the understanding of my capabilities and how to make them work to best suit my needs to accomplish a goal.  It’s something I have done many times in my life, but never really understood what it was or what I should call it.  I just always told myself I was “on a roll.”   That feeling like no matter what I touched it turned to gold.

It’s the mindset that my livelihood and happiness does not have to be contingent upon a singular achievement.  Whether that be a business, a woman, or a dollar figure.  Being aware that there are numerous opportunities out there to create success in my life.  I just have to keep trying new things and keep looking until I find what works. Then once that no longer works, either tweak it or move on to the next opportunity.

The abundance mentality is the opposite of desperate.  I have allowed myself to act desperate so often in life when I did not need to.  There’s been times in my life that I have had 100’s of thousands of dollars sitting in a bank account, but I chose to skip out on amazing opportunities because I didn’t want to spend $1000 to invest in me.  I have had situations where multiple women were chasing after me.  But I decided to keep chasing the one that it didn’t work out with time and time again because “she was the one.”

These are all acts of desperation.  I was clinging onto what I had for dear life.  Hoping and praying it would last or come back to me.  I would squeeze every last ounce out of a person or opportunity because I feared not being able to find more.  Even when the well had run dry I would keep going back, instead of focusing my efforts on new ventures that could make the future more fruitful.

So many times in life I have settled when I know I could have done better.  This behavior makes me unattractive to the world.  The universe senses that and it pushes opportunities away from me.  The abundance mindset is the ability to value myself accurately and appropriately so that I can let go of things and people that no longer serve me in a positive manner.  Because I know that I can find someone or something else that will better suit me and my needs.

Maybe I’ve Just Looked At It All Wrong

PERCEPTION

Single at 35, unsure about a career, living off my savings in a small apartment I rent with the only thing that loves me unconditionally, my dog.  I look at my life and feel like I am a failure.  I should own my own house, I can certainly afford it.  I should settle down, have a relationship and a family.  Live a more “normal” life.

People often tell me I need to put roots down and create a life somewhere.  But what if that’s not the path for me right now?  I have no urge to own my own house.  I only want a house because I am embarrassed by the fact I don’t own one at my age.  I’m embarrassed by how I choose to live even though I have the means to live much better.

I put all these outward expectations on myself.  I don’t live the life I envisioned I would at 35.  People probably look down on me and my behavior.  Wondering when I will pull my life together and “grow up.”  I beat the shit out of myself mentally and emotionally.  I have so much guilt and shame from my past and it spills over into how I judge my life today.

These past 5-6 months have been very difficult for me.  I lost my relationship with my girlfriend, her son and the life I thought I was going to live.  I am unhappy with my career choices.  I’m not making the type of money I am accustomed to.  Life has drastically changed in many ways.

During this time I have struggled with depression to the point that I have contemplated suicide on more than one occasion.  I have told myself that how I am living is unacceptable.  But why?  Who’s rules have I been living my life by?

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve fucked up a lot.  I have put life off for longer than I should.  Maybe I have Peter Pan Syndrome.  I’ve missed out on a lot of great opportunities and relationships in my life because of my choices.  However, those same choices are whats driving me to change my life for the better.

Fear is the driving force behind all my negative thoughts about my life.  Fear that I will never find someone to share my life with.  Fear that I will never have a family.  Fear that I wont be able to find success in the legitimate world.  Fear that I will end up like my father.  Fear that I will settle for a life less than I am capable of living.  Fear of making mistakes.  Fear of failure.  It’s this illusion of fear that I have allowed to run my life and keep me from living the life I deserve. (more…)

When I Just Don’t Have The Words

Some days I can sit down and the words and emotions flow like Natty Light at a frat keg party.  I can express exactly what I am feeling and thinking.  I’m in a state of flow.  Its a an amazing rush.  I feel like Arnold in Pumping Iron.  “Im cuming all day and night” 

Then there are days like today.  I feel like I’m beating my coked up dick with sandpaper.  No matter how hard I try I’m going to end up with half a chubby that’s really chaffed and sore.  I have a lot inside of me that I want to say, but the words just seem to escape me.

I have a vision in my mind of how my writing should look.  Being hopeful my words can help others .  Putting my stories and thoughts out for those who can related and are struggling to find their way.  My goal is to create pieces of art that cause others to become interested in their own lives.  To help them start experimenting with what works and what doesn’t.  I strive to build a successful life to show others that if someone like me can do it anyone can.  “Each one teach one.”  Everyone has some gift they can and should share with the world.

Creativity has been a struggle throughout most of my life.  Always wanting someone to give me direction on what to do with my life.  Having a them lay out a solid game plan and show me the end goal.  The majority of my hesitation stems form fear of trying something new and looking like a fool to others.  I have struggled to be a leader.  Writing allows me that creative outlet where I can take the risks.  I can bare my soul in a cathartic way that forces me to face my fears.  Writing builds leadership quality because only I can create with the words that are in my mind.  There is no one to tell me what or how to write.

For me, its important to push forward and create when I don’t feel like it.  Complacency and laziness haunt me at times.   Im just getting back into writing so I need the reps and the practice.  Many times I just vomit utter shit onto my computer screen that seemed like an amazing idea when I started.  But I learn and I grow from the exercise.  Even if what I produce may not make it onto my blog its never wasted effort.  Writing always serve some purpose for my life at the time.  It could be as simple as forcing me to get out of my head, or it could help me work through some of my deep seeded shit that brings me down.

I get to say some real shit that people may judge me for.  Friends, family members, business partner, acquaintances may all view at me a little differently after hearing my story.  The ability to be genuine and authentic is what touches and inspires others.  I want my readers to feel my joy and pain.  People will hopefully laugh or cringe at the dumb shit I’ve done and feel better about themselves.   If Anything I have experienced and shared helps the life of others I consider it a success.

 

What I learned Last Night at the Casino

Last night I got the itch.  I was bored, no one wanted to go out and I needed to get out of the house for a bit.  I decided to take a trip to the casino.  The delusions of grandeur started flowing in my head.  I saw me there spending an action packed night of meeting new people, laughing and watching the money roll in.  Now, from my experience, the odds of my night going that route were about as likely as Klansman finding a date on blackpeoplemeet.com.  But, I went into it with a positive attitude and was ready to play some blackjack.  Don’t get me wrong I have won big before, but its been awhile.

I scoped the place out for a few minutes until I found a table I felt comfortable with.  I sat down, threw out a grand and was ready to play.  Most the night I was up and down small amounts.  I couldn’t really get traction one way or the other.  I decided to change tables.  Once I got to the new table it was all over very quickly.  I played to win, made all the right calls.  The cards just didn’t fall my way this night.  As usual the house won.  I should have just walked up to the dealer, handed him my chips, told him to kick me in the balls and been on my way.  It would have saved me some time

Normally I would be the typical loser in the casino and done one of two things.  Either I would have pulled out more money and kept losing, or I would have continuously replayed those hands over and over in my head.  Making judgment calls on what I should have done.  I would have made myself completely miserable thinking about how I should have played.  The mental and emotional hangover would have probably lasted for a couple days.  I would have shamed myself for being so stupid and wasteful with my money.  Those thoughts would have snowballed from money worries to my ex, I’m not in the shape I want to be, all the way to why I’m not where I want to be in life and just kept going.  The negativity would compound and spiral out of control quickly for two maybe three days.  All over my decision to gamble that cost me to lose a $1000.  Which a friend of mine made me feel worse about when I told him how much I lost.   He responded “You lost what my 60 hour work week makes me before taxes.”  I could have gone without hearing that.

Im not a rich man by any means, so that money could have been spent in much better ways.  The thing is its the past.  Its done and can’t be changed and I have accepted that.  That may not seem like a whole lot to some people, but for someone like me that is HUGE.  I am starting to be able to make mistakes without shaming myself.  I don’t have to place a negative value on myself because I had a little set back.  Just because I lost last night doesn’t prove my life is a constant failure.  In the past I would have allowed myself to see things that way.

Losing that money turned out to be an investment in my mental health.  Im not saying it was the best value for the investment.  Losing $100 and feeling this way would have been much better.  For someone who obsesses and allows those obsessions to turn into much larger issues I feel like this is a pretty big step in the right direction for me.  Learning how to deal with mistakes and failure without the toxic shame.  Also, I will probably stay away from the casino for awhile too.  It’s been making me its bitch for a couple months now.

 

Dealing with Crippling Anxiety and Fear This Morning

I went to bed last night feeling well and free looking for to the day ahead, but my mind and my dreams had other plans.  I woke up in a mental prison.   I was covered in sweat feeling like the flu hit me.  It wasn’t the flu that had me paralyzed to the point I couldn’t get out of bed.  It was my mind. My fear and anxiety crippled me.  I was pretty sure the day was over before it began.  The Struggles with my life I have been facing had apparently snowballed overnight.  They all flooded me at once.  It was too much.  Thoughts were racing through my head about my business, my life, my ex.  Thoughts of how the stress is eating up my muscle causing me to lose weight and get ill.  The stress is causing my already thin head of hair to fall out quicker.  Over and over again the same thing replayed in my head.  I’m lost and I’m not making progress!

After about 90 minutes of laying in my bed, tossing back and forth, I decided I had to get up and drink my morning shake.   As soon as I swallowed the last gulp I stormed back into the safety of my bed.  I cuddled with my dog for a little bit.  Finally I couldn’t take it anymore and I got up and sat on the couch.  My hands and body were trembling.  It was as if I had done too much speed.  My brain was causing the rest of my body to get totally out of whack.  I knew I had to take action an do something to get out of my head.

The first step was to try the mindful awareness app that had been sitting unused on my phone for months. My therapist had recommended it as a way to  to help center myself.  The app made a slight difference, calming my breathing and allowing me feel the spots where the anxiety was resonating from.  It wasn’t enough to get me off the couch.

Next I went to YouTube and looked up motivational videos.  I watch a few until something clicked.  This video spoke to me for some reason.  I played it repeatedly until I worked up enough energy to take a shower and head to the gym.  I literally listened to this video for the better part of two hours.  The strength I found in the words I heard got me out my house and through my workout.

The most impactful part of the video for me was when they discussed “yet.”  The speaker talked about how people put in the effort and they keep pushing and pushing, but they aren’t getting to where they see others or where they want to be.  They are giving it there all and putting everything they have into their life but it just hasn’t happened “yet.”  That three letter word, yet, gave me hope.  It fueled a fire inside of me to do my best with what I had today.

On many days like this I would look at how late it had gotten before I got out of bed and given up on the day.  Before the day had even started I would have looked at it at a failure.  I would tell myself tomorrow would be better.  Then I realized all was ok.  There was still plenty of time in the day to make it great.  I can still accomplish and build today.  there is no reason to trade today in and take a mulligan. I Forgave myself for feeling defeated.  In my head I made the choice to make the best day I was capable of.

This morning allowed me to revisit several principles the world and others have taught me over the years:

  1. Even though I hurt like hell it didn’t kill me
  2. My life is much better and more fulfilling than I give it credit for
  3. I do not have the answers to my life right now and that’s ok
  4. The human mind is so powerful that it can be my best asset or my worst enemy
  5. I can’t always control my feelings but I can control how I let them affect me
  6. The only way to get out of my head and feel better is to take action

Even though I didn’t know what to do or how to make myself feel better, I still took action.  That was the only cure for my situation. Action allowed me to change my outlook.  If one thing doesn’t work I have to change my approach and try something else.  I needed action to get out of my head and refocus my thoughts.  To give me the strength and energy to get through the day.

The universe, God or whoever; taught me a valuable lesson today.  Like most experiences in life I need to look at the pain I went through with gratitude for the knowledge I have gained.  Now I have a plan for tomorrow or any other day in case I wake up feeling the same way.  I have created a contingency plan.  I know the steps I can take if I feel this way again.  I have the app ready to go and I have new motivational videos lined up to to watch.  If those things aren’t enough I have articles ready to read, podcasts to listen to and people who I can talk to.

It was a reminder that every day I need to create, build and live the best life I can.  Some days little victories like getting out of bed are a huge success.  I have to take these little successes and allow them to accumulate to bigger successes.  Before I know it life has a way of shifting itself from fathom to abundance.  When I look at very successful people I know, they key seems to be humbleness and humility.  To do the right things on both parts of the spectrum and to show appreciation and gratitude for the life you live.

 

I Want To Be The Drunk Guy Dancing At The Bar

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I turned to my friends and said “look at those idiots, I’m so glad we don’t have to do that.”  I ridiculed the guys dancing at the bar, trying so desperately to meet girls.

In reality, most of the those people are out there living life and having fun.  They are the ones who have real courage.  They aren’t afraid to look foolish to people like me.  I sit back and judge, but often I don’t have the balls to be out there doing what they are.

Now I don’t necessarily want to be the drunk guy dancing like a maniac at the bar; even though I have.  However, in my mind, it’s a perfect analogy for people who do exactly what they feel like doing.  They don’t worry about other people’s judgments, they just go for it.  That’s the person I want to be in all aspects of my life.

For the last 10-15 years I was “too cool” to try new things.  I felt I didn’t need to do these activities because they were below someone like me.  It’s insane how I would spin this shit in my head.  The fact is I wasn’t confident in myself.  I feared how other people viewed me.  Deep down I looked up to those who conquered their fears and dance drunk at the bar.  They don’t seem to fear rejection.  They feel they have something to offer and aren’t afraid to prove it.

Years and years of getting what I wanted without having to try very hard put me at a disadvantage.  I missed out on an important skill set for a successful life.  The ability to deal with rejection and failure.

I listen to the voices in my head that tell me I can’t do things.  I’m not good enough or I don’t have the skills.  My mind will come up with any excuse why things won’t work out or why I didn’t really want something in the first place.  This is inner dialogue that wants to trap me and keep my life small.

Today I fear taking little risks like talking to strangers, starting new businesses, approaching a girl.  When I put that into perspective of how I have lived my life for the last 20 years it’s insane.  If I fail at talking to a girl, she tells me no and I feel a little embarrassed.  If I fail with a company, I may lose money and set myself back financially.  If I failed in my old lifestyle, I would have easily ended up doing 5-10 years in jail.  To a normal, well adjusted adult this equation doesn’t add up.

For the longest time I rarely second guessed what I was doing.  I knew the consequences of my actions, as well as the repercussions that came along with my choices.  But, it seemed worth it somehow.  Part of me felt I didn’t have anything to lose at the time.  I became a victim of my own circumstances.  I convinced myself this was how I wanted to live my life.  Don’t get me wrong, at times I was scared for my freedom and there were many sleepless night.

Normal, healthy risks in life scare the shit out of me.  I create irrational thought processes in my head based on fear.  Even when there is no evidence anything horrible will happen.  To quote Jamie Foxx, “on the other side of fear there is nothing.”  There is no definite outcomes in life, only what we can create.

Doing the same thing every day is my nightmare – A fate worse than death.  Turning today into an experiment makes life exciting.  What can accomplish and how can I make progress?  Answering those questions makes my life worth living.  If I’m lucky (I use that word in loosest sense) things may even go my way.  I will taste success that day.

When I try something new I build confidence in who I am and what I can endure.  I reinforce the lesson that pain and rejection won’t kill me.  I can’t dwell on the past or worry about the future because my mind is forced to be present and focused on what is occurring this very second.   That’s what being alive is about; living right now.  Nothing can every happen in the past or the future, because all there is is now.

Quieting the noise that goes on in our mind’s establishes mental freedom.  Tune those voices out and see how much better your life becomes.  Go out, get hammered and dance your ass off to whatever song you choose.

 

 

That Feeling In Your Gut When You Just Know

There are very few things quite as powerful as your gut instinct.  It’s amazing how intuitive we really are as humans. How much our body gives us so many signs and clues as to what we should and shouldn’t be doing if we truly pay attention.

The obvious things that hold us back from truly following our gut are fear and doubt.  Those two things are a son-of-a-bitch.  They can wreak havoc on your outlook and life.  We all can very easily persuade ourselves to think that gut feeling is just a pipe dream.  Perhaps we started to late for it to work, or its too difficult a task for us.  Those things may all very well be true.  However, no one ever truly knows unless they try.

Wayne Gretzky said “you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” I am a firm believer in this affirmation. There are so many points in my life that I look back on with regret saying “fuck I should have done this back then.”  The reality is that some of these things I still want to do and can do with my time.

I REALLY like the excuse of “Im too old” or “I missed the wave.”  Those two thoughts allow me to be a giant pussy from time to time.  Never attacking the passions and goals I have.  I hate the thought of starting over. Not making money and having to worry about finances makes me cringe.  The sad reality is that I AM starting over now at 35 anyway.  I quit my previous career over a year ago.  I’ll get into that whole bag of shit at another time.  Time is passing anyway so I should just start over doing something I love and have a passion to do.

An hour ago a friend texted me asking me about working out.  She was talking about how she wanted to tone up and and she needed help.  She lives near me so I just offered to train her a couple times a week.  I got so excited when she said yes.  I love training people.  In general, I have a passion to help anyone reach any goal they may have.  It’s a fucking amazing feeling.  Plus, I figured it will force me to go a couple more times a week.  It will be great way to get in summer shape for me as well.

All of the sudden I got that feeling of fire in my gut.  That feeling of excitement to use my gifts and knowledge to help someone else.  By helping others I get back such an amazing amount of fulfillment internally.  This was gods way of giving me another kick in the ass saying “hey dumby this is what you should be doing with your time”

I started making some goals in my head.  Get my training certifications.  Write more.  Start helping people reach their goals mentally and physically.  Train people. Start a meal prep company like a friend of mine has in Baltimore (If you are down in the Baltimore area check him out https://www.facebook.com/fitfoods2you).  Then the reasons started pouring in of why I cant do this.

  • I already committed to business last year and spent a lot of time and effort working on it
  • I have to get my training certificate and that’s hard and time consuming
  • I should have done this 10 years ago when I first had the idea
  • Im not good enough
  • And most of all IM JUST PLAIN, OLD AFRAID TO LOOK STUPID AND FAIL

All those excuses for the most part are just bullshit.  Yes, there is some truth and failing is a possibility.  But I can fail doing shit I hate doing.  Which has happened to me on several occasions.  The reality is its easy too dream and hard to create.  It takes a huge leap of faith into the unknown.  It takes facing the fears of what could be the treacherous reality in the future.  It takes courage, confidence and hard work ethic.  I have lacked these three things in many aspects of my life over the years.

I fear putting myself out there and how others will receive me. I fear taking risks because I could fail and look less than to others and myself.  I fear that I don’t have the capacity to handle the turmoil and hurt of failure. The funniest thing about this ridiculous fear is that for the vast majority of my life I took huge risks with my freedom to make a living.  Its strange how that fear never stopped me even though it was always on my mind.

I keep reminding myself that all the things that made me safe and successful on the other side of the law can be applicable on the legit side.  I need to develop the work ethic and courage to fall on my face a couple times and keep picking myself up.  I need to be firm, but fair with myself and my abilities.

I have been out of the legitimate business world for such a long time.  Many of the skills that made me successful 8-10 years ago in corporate America have rust on them.  It will take time to polish them up and get them up to a speed that I feel is acceptable and truly produce results.  Until that time I need to keep making mistakes and learning from them.  Once my skills are at that level I will need to strive to keep getting better.  Progressing by pumping out more and more reps and continuing to learn. Complacency is one of the most evil and dangerous character defects out there.

I see SO MANY people out there that have started out with much less of a cushion financially than I have and done SO MUCH more.  Many of these same people also lacked many of the skills and abilities I have.  They know much less about how a business is run and the inner workings of day to day operations.  Very few have tasted the type of financial success I have and don’t fear living with less the way I do.

WHAT THESE PEOPLE DO NOT LACK IS CONFIDENCE, DRIVE, AND THE UNCANNY ABILITY TO CHASE THEIR DREAMS AND MAKE THEM A REALITY.  They do not fear what others think.  In their minds they are already successful.  These types of attributes can’t be bought or faked.  However, they can be learned. Every time you face your fears and take it head on, no matter what the outcome is you learn invaluable lessons about yourself and life.  Those lessons are the building blocks to a happy, successful and fulfilling life.  Just like reps in the gym.  You build the muscles to change your life.  You wont always come out on top but if you can keep pushing forward you will grow an amazing confidence in your abilities.  You will be able to create the world around you that you always dreamed of.  I have seen this happen to others around me in many different aspects of their lives, not just financially.  It is something to truly revel