Everyday Skills I Struggle With as a Human Being

real

Today I met my writing coach for the first time.  My therapist recommended her when I mentioned I was starting a blog.  I figured if I was going to put my thoughts down for the world to see, I should at least try to make them comprehensible .  So I made a little investment in myself and sought out her help.

We met at Starbucks and made our introductions. She provided me with several writing assignments;  seventeen of them to be exact.  This was one of the exercises she asked me to write.

Everyday skills I struggle with as a human being:

  1. Waking up and getting out of bed — It’s a struggle daily
  2. Falling asleep — I can’t remember the last time I went to sleep without sleep aids.
  3. doing my hair — This is the bane of my existence. My hair is thin and keeps getting thinner. It never looks as cool as other peoples.
  4. Making small talk with strangers — I either dominate the conversation or I ask so many questions that I come off creepy
  5. Approaching women and striking up conversations — I’m never sure what to say. I always have this plan to say something smooth or endearing. Instead it usually leads to them looking for their pepper spray.
  6. Making decisions with my time — No matter what decision I make I often second guess if it was the most efficient or effective use of my time
  7. Getting of my phone — I hate the fucking thing. Putting it down for an hour seems nearly impossible
  8. Talking to friends and family on the phone — apparently no one can hear me because I mumble
  9. Staying on task — What was I working on again?
  10. Making reasonable assumptions on the time it will take me to complete a task — I feel that things often take twice as long as they should.
  11. Rushing to nowhere — Im getting better at this but I tend to rush through things just so I can wait somewhere else
  12. Waiting in lines or in traffic — I tend to lose my mind
  13. Driving — Friends that follow me have often asked if I am drunk
  14. Folding laundry — I hang all of my shirts for this reason
  15. Decorating —I’ve never had anything on the walls of the place I’ve lived alone.
  16. Owning Comforters — I haven’t own a comforter in over five years. I don’t know why, I just never use one.
  17. Buying basic adult necessities — utensils, bed sheets, useful things for the bathroom and kitchen. I haven’t owned a kitchen table in almost a year.
  18. Getting to the point of a story — I’m very long winded and get sidetracked. From what I hear talking to me can be exhausting.
  19. Ironing — I don’t own an iron at this point
  20. Matching colors — I am never quite sure what goes together.
  21. Ending bad relationships — I struggle with walking away, even after I know I need too. I keep them going until it becomes so unhealthy that we can no longer speak
  22. Responding to niceties — I skip past the fun part of conversations or emails and jump right into the heart of the matter. At times people find this very off-putting. By the way, off-putting is probably my least favorite word. Hearing it makes my skin crawl. However, it was the most accurate adjective I could think of.
  23. Buying furniture — Thinking about doing this gives me anxiety. I live way below my means. In my apartment I have a bed, a dresser, a couch and a TV that I have sitting on top of an ottoman.
  24. Finding my keys — I always think they are in my pocket. They never are.
  25. I don’t own a wallet — I go with my cash, ID and credit cards wrapped up in a rubber band.
  26. Reading comprehension — I have to reread things numerous times to understand what I have read.
  27. Peeing into the toilet — I spray everywhere and make an awful mess. Sometimes when I wake up in the middle of the night I pee in my sink or out my back door to avoid this happening.
  28. Putting toilet paper on the roll the “right way.” — Apparently the roll should face a certain direction. My ex used to tell me I always put it on backwards
  29. Dealing with boredom — My mind drifts and goes to bad places when I don’t put it to work
  30. Controlling my sweat — Its just what I do. My chest, back and armpits just drip even when I’m not hot. I can’t wear certain color shirts or leave the house without a wife beater on underneath my outfit.

I’m sure I could go on with this list forever. But I wont. This is just a small taste of my daily struggle